CAN'T WAIT TO GET MARRIED.

I'm seated in this cold office, and I cant help but envy those married couples still cuddling in bed. It's those times again my fellow inmates of this prison called bachellorness, when we really wished it was our turn to enjoy the fruits of marriage. Well, too much to dream of I'd say. I am still a very young man, not even done with sorting out my own so clearly a family would be an added burden. Don't even talk about the school part, that's a clear line, but.. sigh, i still can't wait to get married.
Marriage is indeed a great face of life. Learning to love and learning to live with your love. Its like starting life all a new, that's how i tend to think of marriage. Waking up in the morning next to your love, spending the whole day in smile because you cant wait to see her in the evening. Pure bliss! That's what marriage is meant to be, a time to reflect to your past, enjoy the present and leave in eagerness for the future. That's how I dream of marriage, and that is why I cant wait to say 'I do'. However, the current state of martrimony as portrayed by our slightly older generation leaves alot to be desired, and gives me second thoughts concerning this great institution of marriage.
Recently, a reknown TV journalist was murdered by her enstranged husband in what was described as the so becoming common domestic violence. Imagine, marriage and all its beauty turning to be a field for murder, hurt and hatred. This is just one of the few statistics, and marriage settlements are proving costly for the younger generation. It's certainly not as easy as it seems to be. Those words 'I do' may just be tantamount to an admittance of murder before a court of law and may literally subject you to 'marital imprisonment'.
Clearly, it means there is something that we are doing wrong. What is intriguing though is that, the reasons why improper marriage settings are slowly ticking like a time bomb, ready to completely immaterialise our already degrading morals, are reasons so easy to identify and easy to deal with piecemeal. Here is what I think.

    1. What is the purpose of marriage?
Why do we really get married? Is there anything else of worth besides the fun? We have at times misconceptualised the validity and essence of marriage, and as much as we hold parties to mark wedding days, we at times really fail to put our minds, souls and hearts to it. That partner you are married to is not just a trophy to show around. That is somebody you ought to die loving. Marriage should be based on love and not a hurry to experiment.

Marriage time is a period of tolerance, where you give your all and expect to do things not at will but at mutual agreement. It is not just a time to enjoy and make babies, its a time to really show you worth and to totally love your partner. The moment your marriage is based on any other reason, then it surely even ain't worth a try.

     2. Infedelity.
Every afternoon Ciku is busting them at Classic F.M, Jimmy Gathu has even gone extreme by poppin out of wardrobes to warn their silly arses. What's the point of infedelity in marriage? It could be slightly, and don't get me wrong, slightly acceptable in courting, but the moment you put a ring to it and you still play around, your are infact playing yourself too, because theoretically, marriage makes you one.
Marriage calls for flawless faithfuless, and probably the worst enemy to marriage is lack of trust due to unfaithfulness, extra-marital affairs amd infidelity. If you can't stick to one partner you had rather not make that promise to them.

      3. What's the hurry?
As much as marriage befits the ending of a fairy-tale, its never really relevant to rush. Two days of courting and marriage just pops up like a puffball in a cow den, then your doomed. Most successful marriages take a long time in dating, this way partners are able to learn one another and tolerate each other. They almost taste marriage before they can have it. They learn to make the best out of the ups and to survive the downs. Before you rush to get married, it is wise to know who your partner really is, and no better way to do so other than giving it time. Think of it this way, the longer the jet takes on the runway, the better the take off.
Take the Duke and the Dutchess of... okay, let me just make it simple, take William and Kate for example. She was even nicknamed 'Waity Kaity'. They never rushed to marry despite pressure from all corners. Good things come to those who wait.

     4. Its marriage guys, make it worth.
This one is mostly for the men. What happens when finally you married? No more flowers, no more time together, no more rendezvous, no more Mr. Romantic. Marriage should be great time, to enjoy love more than any other time. So those little surprises should remain coming if the love is still coming. Thats how its meant to be and that way the flame of love will keep burning brighter every day.
Don't let someone step up for you and continue doing what you stopped. Trust me, someone may just do that.

      5. Talk.       
I don't know how may of you have noticed this, but, doesn't talking it out always save a great deal? It certainly does, and before you can go out and clobber each other and call each other the wildest of names, try pouring it out on each other through a civilised converstion. Well, I have heard that in marriage, its very easy to make each other mad, but the moment guys talk it out, it's back to normalcy before anything goes out of hand.

      6. Pray to God, read the Bible, this life needs a map.
It's interesting to watch a cheetah hunt, his fore-limbs move in respect to its vision, stepping only where there are no ruffling dry leaves. Here is the beauty of it all, so accurately, its hind-limbs step the exact spot the fore-limbs do, that way, the prey will never elude. Imagine letting God be ahead of you in decisions partaining marriage? Would we ever get lost? Certainly not. Just like a cheetah's fore-limbs, he'd show us where to step.
All we need is a map, and this road would be so easy to walk.
For our Muslim counterparts, I'm certain the Kuran bears clear directions too. Because from the beginning, God knew it wasn't ever gon be easy for man and woman to live together.



I am probably the last person to talk about marriage because for starters, I have no experience whatsoever. However this is just what I think, I believe it can always work out if done properly.